Whispers from the Myth Teller

Tue, 21 Jan 2025 13:36:38 GMT

Today is a day I've been dreading. I'm going to see the dentist to have more teeth pulled, then getting my first denture.

I'm going to get emotional. Hopefully I'll be able to keep it together until I get home, but I might lose it in the metro.

Herne, give me strength.

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I can't deal

Mon, 20 Jan 2025 22:35:02 GMT

It feels like the end, or maybe the beginning of a traumatic time in the world.

I refused to watch the Trump inauguration, but from the reactions I've be hearing, it was awful. I even saw a clip where Trump admits that he rigged the last election so that he would win. This surprises me not at all.

But now, who can stop what's about to happen, not only in the US, but globally? I don't know. Who can protect us from the impacts of madmen?

If the aliens are going to save us, this would be a good year for them to reveal themselves.

But today, it's all I can do to not hide under my bed.

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The 2025 Revisit of Dreamwidth

Sun, 19 Jan 2025 07:23:44 GMT

On this day in 2025, Tiktok went dark in the US, land of the free. We'll see how long that lasts.

Being fed up with Meta and its shenanigans, I decided to shutter my Instagram account. Facebook is much tougher to shutter because it's useful for events and community building. Until we have a better solution for that, I'm probably going to stick with it.

But for journalling purposes, I want to rediscover Dreamwidth. I'm hoping my community of nerds who are fleeing X, Insta, and even Facebook might find me here. Time will tell.

We have choices, even if our digital oligarchs think they have us trapped. But it's up to us to exercise those choices and flex our buying power.

Join me here and let's give those clods a reason to worry.

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Confrontation

Mon, 01 Jun 2020 22:37:25 GMT

I had my headphones in, so I could not hear what he was saying, but I could see in his eyes that this was not going to be a good dialogue. Taking the buds out, I asked "Excuse me?"

Pointing at my knees, he snarled "Why are you wearing a skirt? Are you some kind of fag?"

I looked around the metro car. Those that heard the question looked down or away, uncomfortable. Others looked pained or worried.

"This is an American version of a Scottish kilt called a Utilikilt and it is traditionally designed for men." I really should have stopped there. "I feel pretty in it. You don't like it?"

"No. You look like a woman, like a fucking pussy." He was clenching his fists now. "Men pretending to be women is what's wrong with this fucking country."

I looked around again. More people looking away, others now looking up from their phones, taking their own headphones out, confused. "Times are always a-changing man. Either change with it or get out of the way." I really shouldn't have been that sassy, but I'm just tired of these has-been old guards who think they can just strong-arm anyone who doesn't fit inside their restrictive view of the world.

The guy stood up suddenly, got uncomfortably close, and looked me square in the eye. I could smell the morning's cigarette on his breath. I took a mental note of where the emergency brake handle was, just in case I needed to make a wild grab for it, wondering if I would get fined $500.

But I looked back into those eyes, and for a moment, I could see into his past. I could see the wonder-eyed kid who ran through the grass, his dog keeping pace. I heard his laughter and contented sighs while looking at the star-filled sky, believing he could touch each one with the power of dreams.

And then I saw his stars go out, one by one, and his laughter was silenced and locked in a chest that was meant for boys rather than men.

Suddenly I was back in that metro, nose-to-nose with a man who intended me harm, frustrated and angry and not really understanding why. "What was it that you had to give up?" I asked.

Confused, he took a half-a-step back, looking around quickly. "Wh-What?" This was not the reaction he was expecting from me.

"That dream you had as a kid. That thing you wanted to do, but they teased you about it, shamed you for it, made you feel weak and afraid." His eyes went wide and he was back in that place: a boy frightened and confused. Loving what he loved, not understanding how it could be wrong.

"They made you give it up and it wasn't fair, so what was it?" I could see his brain churning. It wasn't fair, all these people breaking the rules and getting parades for it when he wasn't allowed that one thing that made him happy to dream. Why should a guy like me wear what I wanted in public and everybody accepts it, but he was forced to give up what he wanted or suffer the consequences from shame, pain, isolation.

"What was it? Tell me." I whispered. The metro was nearing it's next stop where the doors would open and the moment would be gone. I wanted to see where this would go, even if it meant his fist connecting with my face. I needed to know. "It's not too late, you know. We've thrown out the rules. You could have it now if you wanted."

Tears rimmed his eyes for a moment, his face softened, hands relaxed, but then the metro lurched to a stop and the doors flew open. The moment was gone, his face hardened and he grabbed at my shoulder to push me aside. But as he barged past me, making for the open doors, he growled.

"Dancer. I wanted to be a dancer." And he was gone.

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Hold on to anything you need

Fri, 29 May 2020 16:53:26 GMT

Well, it's 12 weeks since I got back from Arizona and I put myself in isolation, just to be on the safe side. 12 long weeks of solitude and living in a tiny square of space, where before this, I felt like there was no where I could not go.

And now, when I look at where we've arrived, it seems like a clash of incongruities. Death, suffering, corruption, and willful ignorance from the top to the bottom of our society, stretching out in all directions.

And at the same time, I've watched the snow melt away and the greenery of spring gush from the once bare trees in my yard. Death and chaos all around, but here in my little corner of the world, new life awakens and flourishes, as it has done like clockwork for 52 springs.

It almost doesn't seem possible that both realities can sit side-by-side. And yet, the beauty of life abounds and it will not be denied.

The fear bombards us from all sides. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the untrue. Fear of what we don't know. The fear is a wildfire that tears through our society, turning us against each other and away from those we have never met or would ever want to meet. And that wildfire is tempering our hearts, hardening them, making us forget who we are or who we aspire to be, as if there is no room left for such dreams.

I'm here to tell you that there is room for these dreams, but you need to hold on. Hold on to your true selves, hold on to hope, hold on to your compassion most of all. Those dreams, those selves, and all that pent up compassion is going to carry us through this.

Everyone is hurting, and if that is all we have left, then let it be enough to form that common ground on which we can gather as family, as brothers and sisters, as fathers and mothers, as friends and lovers, and even those people we don't really know or that we fear.

If you feel yourself slipping away, just connect to the abundance that is springing up around us. Just ... hold on. We need you.

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The heat and productivity!

Thu, 28 May 2020 11:45:04 GMT

Yesterday's heat was rough and my AC picked the worst moment to conk out. Fortunately, it was a Breaker problem, which was easily fixed.

But to fix it, I have to call my landlord because the breaker box is in the garage and I don't have access. Fortunately, he's pretty good about responding quickly.

There was a moment though where my brain could not function in that heat. I could not even goof off, the heat was so overwhelming.

Today will be better since the AC works now. This heat is making me miss the office though, the one advantage of having a workplace to go to.

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This is a test.

Fri, 31 Jan 2020 20:01:10 GMT

I'm testing out this new media. It's weird how much it looks like LJ.

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