Updates on my cousin
Aug. 28th, 2008 07:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mythtellerI went to visit my cousin last night at the hospital, but I was surprised to discover he had been moved out of there just that morning. He's been transferred to West Island Palliative Care in Kirkland, which is a strong statement on the current state of affairs.
I'll be going to see him tonight, and as much as I can over the coming weeks/months. He knows what's happening and is lucid enough to have accepted it. After years of treatment and unending pain, he's finding comfort in the fact that it will soon end. But he's also young, strong, and despite this cancerous tumor (which has already claimed more than 1/3 of brain), he's relatively healthy. His sister reports that he is incredibly responsive and lucid considering the damage.
This tragic end for my cousin is bringing an issue into focus for me. I have a several cousins who live in Montreal, but I have no contact with them. When we were younger, I was the eldest cousin and at family gatherings, I was often left in charge of the kids. We were close back then, but with going away to university, growing up, and building my career, we all grew apart.
When I moved to Montreal, I went to see each of their families once, but it all felt so awkward, like we didn't know how to be with each other outside of holiday gatherings. I took this to be a hint, so I didn't push more encounters. And at their ends, they never called me back (except for funerals).
Maybe we're both guilty of ignoring the other, but maybe I need to make more of an effort to rebuid our relationships. But again, since they have never made an effort to maintain any relationship with me, should I push one out of them? It's hard to know what to do.
In closing, I want to thank everyone for all the prayers, reiki, and other forms of energetic healing that you sent his way. Although now it seems that it is his time to pass on, I'd like to believe that the healing energy that was sent eased his pain in a way that the medication could not, allowing him to be more lucid than medical science says he should be.
I'll be going to see him tonight, and as much as I can over the coming weeks/months. He knows what's happening and is lucid enough to have accepted it. After years of treatment and unending pain, he's finding comfort in the fact that it will soon end. But he's also young, strong, and despite this cancerous tumor (which has already claimed more than 1/3 of brain), he's relatively healthy. His sister reports that he is incredibly responsive and lucid considering the damage.
This tragic end for my cousin is bringing an issue into focus for me. I have a several cousins who live in Montreal, but I have no contact with them. When we were younger, I was the eldest cousin and at family gatherings, I was often left in charge of the kids. We were close back then, but with going away to university, growing up, and building my career, we all grew apart.
When I moved to Montreal, I went to see each of their families once, but it all felt so awkward, like we didn't know how to be with each other outside of holiday gatherings. I took this to be a hint, so I didn't push more encounters. And at their ends, they never called me back (except for funerals).
Maybe we're both guilty of ignoring the other, but maybe I need to make more of an effort to rebuid our relationships. But again, since they have never made an effort to maintain any relationship with me, should I push one out of them? It's hard to know what to do.
In closing, I want to thank everyone for all the prayers, reiki, and other forms of energetic healing that you sent his way. Although now it seems that it is his time to pass on, I'd like to believe that the healing energy that was sent eased his pain in a way that the medication could not, allowing him to be more lucid than medical science says he should be.
